I hate small talk. Instead, I’m gonna try big talk…
On the Elevator:
“What if we all die in here? So, is death the extinction of the self, or is the self really just an illusion anyway? I mean, where were we before we were born, huh? Could somebody press 8?”
At the Copier:
"It's so weird that we're making copies when life itself is a simulacrum. Was it Umberto Eco who said the fake becomes the real in postmodernity? Anyway, I hear the universe may actually be a hologram on the surface of a black hole. Oh shit, it says replace toner."
Getting Coffee:
"Why is coffee the only thing that's fairly traded? Every other product, we don't care how it got here. It’s like, thanks to globalization, we're all complicit with injustice of mind-blowing proportions, so we’ve fetishized this one commodity in order to assuage our guilt, you know? This better not be decaf."